Lust, Attraction, Attachment
by Aisling-Siobhan
Summary: Frostiron Month 06: Theirs didn't start at the beginning like most relationships, but it did start somewhere. It started with curiosity and hot sex, a bottle of whiskey now and then, and intelligent conversation. The feelings developed after.


The last part wasn't on FFNet because it was mostly porn. You can find it on my Tumblr, the Frostiron Livejournal or at AO3.

This is for the Frostiron Month Tumblr: Prompt 6.

July 16-18: Firsts: _First date, first kiss, first time having sex together, first time Loki goes Jötun for Tony? Things always have to start somewhere. _

"**Lust, attraction, attachment**"

**Disclaimer: ** The Avengers, Tony, Loki, etc belong to Marvel, Stan Lee, et co. I make no money from this and own nothing, don't sue.

**Summary: ** [Tony/Loki] Frostiron Month 06: Theirs didn't start at the beginning like most relationships, but it did start somewhere. It started with curiosity and hot sex, a bottle of whiskey now and then, and intelligent conversation. The feelings developed after.

**Warnings: ** Slash. Established friends with benefits. Loki/Tony. Loki wants more. Tony needed a clue. Argr abuse. Asgardians are prejudiced.

**Rating: ** PG13.

**A/N**: Still pre-writing these, so I can maybe be on time posting throughout July. So far, so good, hey? 8.5 out of 10!

**Title**: From Helen Fisher's book (_Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love_): "Some people have sex with someone new and then fall in love. Some fall in love first, then have sex… Love can start off with any of these [lust, attraction, attachment] feelings."

_XXX_

**Words: **2,726

**Chapter 1**

Tony cleared his throat. He scratched at one of his eyebrows, and then cleared his throat again. Unlike Loki, who was staring it at him over the top of his menu, Tony purposely didn't take his eyes away from the list of food he could have quoted off in his sleep. He came here a lot, he knew the food; he liked the food, that's why he picked the place, but reading the menu gave him an excuse not to talk.

"So," Loki attempted softly, trying to put an end to the awkward silence that had descended upon them once they had arrived at the restaurant.

Tony cleared his throat again, eyes darting around the restaurant in search of the waiter. Usually, the wait staff in this place could be relied upon to turn up whenever his numerous dates started to get a little awkward. The fact that he and Loki had been sitting in silence (aside from the occasional throat clearing) since they had arrived twenty minutes ago should have been a big fucking neon sign flashing, "help me!" But so far, no one but the Maitre'D had acknowledged him.

"Do you know what you're having?" Loki asked, after a couple false started and some nervous lip biting.

"Hey, maybe you should be our waiter? You got that spot on!" Tony raised his voice purposely, glancing back over his shoulder towards the cluster of staff members who watched wide-eyed but useless as the couple ruined their first date.

One rushed forward after a moments hesitation, pen in one hand and notebook pages scrunched up in the other as he anxiously twisted it. "Good evening, sirs. Can I get you anything to drink?"

Tony glanced back down at the menu, even going as far as to open it up and flick through the pages: pretending to search for the drinks menu, that was always on the back. Loki sighed softly, shaking his head as he pulled the menu out of Tony's hands and laid it on the table on top of his own. "We'll have a bottle of Balcones Fifth Anniversary, please. Actually," he amended, noticing with displeasure the way Tony was now drumming the fingers of his right hand on the table, "bring us two."

"An excellent choice, sir," the waiter stuttered, looking every bit as starstruck as he sounded. His eyes never landed on Tony's face; the staff here were too used to him by now. Instead, he was fixated on Loki, the pallor of his face suggested that there might have been a healthy bit of fear mixed in with the admiration he was feeling. "Two bottles of our best," (he meant 'most expensive', Tony thought snidely) "bourbon coming right up. Are you ready to order now too?"

Loki was going to wait, have a glass of bourbon whiskey (the kind he knew Tony preferred) and wait for his lover to relax, but obviously Tony had other plans. He rattled off the simplest dish on the menu, because it was quick to make and quick to eat, which meant they could leave that much sooner (or he could just focus on his drinking to avoid a conversation). Contrarily, Loki ordered the most complicated food option. He shot Tony a dirty look when the genius opened his mouth to order over him, causing the mortal to snap it shut so hurriedly, he bit his tongue.

"What is your problem?" Loki finally asked. It took the waiter seven point three seconds to bring over the first bottle of Balcones and two short tumblers: those were the first words spoken in that time.

"Problem? Me? What, no, no problem!" Tony's hand shook as he poured a double measure of the bourbon into his glass, having snatched the bottle from the unsuspecting waiter's hand. Some sloshed over the sides, and some got onto his hand, but Loki was quicker than the human. He grabbed hold of the hand with one of his own, and with the other tugged the bottle from Tony's white-knuckled grip so he could lift the wet hand up to his mouth. He licked slowly, one long stripe from first knuckle to wrist, tracing the vein that stood out even under tanned skin.

"You have a problem, and I will know what it is, Stark."

Tony tried to think of something to say, anything to say that might save the evening (and his relationship) but all he could think of was how good Loki's tongue felt against his skin.

Loki's tongue always felt good though, no matter if it was licking his hand, or his throat, or lapping at the head of his cock. Loki's hand was cool against his own, skin soft and hardly calloused. His lips were soft too, mouth that little bit warmer than his hands, so when they kissed and Loki cupped his cheeks it never failed to make Tony shudder with need. Actually, everything about Loki was nice: his eyes were gorgeous; his smile was blinding (his real smile, not the one that he let everyone see. This one was just for Tony, and it was breath-taking), the grin he gave just before he'd take Tony's cock into his mouth was wicked, made of sin and it made Tony whine pathetically every time he saw it. Loki had a great ass, an amazing figure, a killer sense of humour (literally sometimes), made these really kind, unexpected gestures occasionally, and when he sang it was like someone was breaking Tony's heart. Even when he was just talking, Loki had a nice voice; the right mix of inflection and blasé, attitude and affection, a way with words that rolled them off the tip of his tongue and made you _want_ to believe them, even though Loki was, also, a brilliant liar.

The first thing Tony had noticed about Loki (aside from the 'crazy'), had been his eyes.

Loki had lovely eyes. Bright green when he was happy, darker when he was overcome with lust, and a horrible poisonous colour when he was angry. They had been blue during the invasion, but they had been green ever since. Tony had met him in a bar, noticed him from the corner of his eyes, and caught the green gaze. Tony hadn't recognized the face at first; he'd seen the eyes and liked them, and then Loki had turned away (not having seen him at all), and Tony had noticed his ass.

It was firm and round, sinfully covered up by tight leather pants that hugged him in all the rights places. Tony had licked his lips at the time, fingers on his right hand curling around the glass he had been holding as he imagined cupping Loki's cheeks. They'd fit perfectly in his hands, fingers squeezing his ass tight, and Loki with his head thrown back and his legs around Tony's waist as they fucked against a wall. And then Loki had turned around again. Tony had seen his face, had recognized him, but overwhelmed by lust and attraction, Tony hadn't cared at all.

He had bought Loki a drink, and then another, and another (and a few for himself), and he had taken Loki back to his place and fucked him over the back of the couch. Three nights later, they'd crossed paths in a pub, argued about literature and Tony had refused to believe that Shakespeare was friends with Thor (though from the way they talked it was probable) because Loki was a major troll. The night ended with copious amounts of alcohol and sex, and a little bit of rinse and repeat. It had sort of spiralled from there.

Until one morning, Tony woke up in his bed, with Loki beside him, back to him and wrapped up in his arms, and he found himself thinking about how nice it would be to wake up like that every morning. They'd slept like that before, woken like that before, but that had been the first time he considered their arrangement as a 'forever' thing. Tony had been freaked out by the thought. Pepper had been his only stable relationship, and after they had split Tony honestly hadn't considered trying again with anyone else. He had long ago ruled out marriage and children from his life, but Pepper had stayed with him despite knowing that (and it was Iron Man who had driven them apart- but who could stay with Iron Man?). Surely Loki wouldn't want to? He got bored just as easily as Tony did, and the God had never dropped any hints about wanting more than what they had.

The resulting freak-out had been stalled by Loki's waking, and then re-started by Pepper turning up early with a bundle of paperwork that needed signing. She had greeted them from the bedroom doorway with a: "I was going to leave you alone long enough to kick him out, but then Jarvis told me it was Loki. Morning, Loki." Tony's brain had ground to a halt: why would Pepper think he _wouldn't_ kick Loki out? Loki didn't live there, Loki only stayed over a few times, except for the times they'd camp out in the lab and argue about whose 'science' was more advanced. Which, was frequently. Tony had fled the room, grabbing half of the papers out of Pepper's hands as he passed (so she'd have no choice but to follow him with the other half).

When she'd asked him if he'd eaten dinner and he had told her no because he was too busy eating Loki, she'd made them reservations at the restaurant he now found himself in. But, Pepper had left it up to him to ask Loki out.

The God had been pleased, excited even, and they met at the Tower as they usually did before they started arguing, or drinking, or fucking, but this time they had to go outside. In the limo, they kept each other pretty busy with tongues and hands and laughing at Happy's scowl in the rear-view mirror, but once they had reached the restaurant Tony had started freaking out again.

It was too much like a real date. With a real partner. With real commitments and real issues they would have to work through instead of sweep under the proverbial carpet by distracting the other with a quick fuck. It was too much in the wake of Pepper's break up, too hard to imagine a future with Loki (and fucking terrifying to imagine one without), and Tony was scared. When he got scared, he got nervous and quiet and he drank a lot.

But Loki knew liars, just as well as he knew himself, and Tony's "I'm fine, nothing is wrong" wasn't going to fly with him. So, instead Tony told the truth. "I'm afraid of messing up what we have."

Loki's eyes widened and his mouth opened as his previously clenched jaw went slack. "What?"

"I like what we have, you know. You and me, and science and magic, and sex. You make me laugh, and you put up with me, and argue with me and it's brilliant. I like you, a lot more than I'm comfortable admitting honestly, but I break things, and yeah I fix them afterwards, but some things can't be fixed. I don't want to break us." Tony took an overly large gulp of bourbon to compensate himself for his honesty.

Loki was beaming, eyes bright and cheeks turning red. "I thought you were ashamed to be seen with me," the God admitted quietly.

"Everyone knows what we've been doing," Tony pointed out, raising his glass as he pointed from Loki to him and back.

"In the dark of the night, behind closed doors, where you stuff those you are ashamed of acknowledging in public." His voice was soft, but there was something broken about it, something that made Tony's chest ache because he could hear those same words repeated at various others over the centuries; it was written on Loki's expression, resignation, hurt: second best, and secret, every time. Tony wasn't sure how Asgard viewed homosexuality, but from the brief comments Thor had let slip (and the disgusted looks the thunderer had shot his brother when he thought no one was looking during their PDA moments in the Tower), Tony didn't think it was particularly high.

"Why didn't you say something sooner?" He pushed himself out of his seat so fast it almost toppled over. He caught it with his free hand, setting down the glass from the other, before rounding the table to stand beside Loki. "I'm not ashamed of you," Tony told him, taking his face between his hands and pulling the God up just enough for him to lean down to kiss. It was soft and sweet, but lasted long enough for those sitting close by to snap a few pictures. They'd be on the internet in no time, and then Tony could be terrified of Loki leaving him because the world knew about them, instead of Loki leaving him because he was a shitty person. "I could never be ashamed of you. I'm a coward, is all, but that isn't your issue. You shouldn't have had to deal with that. Next time something is bothering you, tell me!"

"I couldn't!" Loki dragged himself away from Tony's embrace long enough to stand from his own chair. "I think this date is over, don't you?"

"Uh, yeah, yeah I guess so." Tony tossed down enough cash to cover the bill, and then Loki teleported them away; neither wanted to wait around for Happy to drive back over. "What do you mean you couldn't?" Tony asked once they were back at the Tower.

"I am argr. I dislike being called so, but that makes it no less true." Loki shrugged his shoulders, imitating casualness, and then he saw Thor leaning against the kitchen counter and his entire body went rigid.

"To be argr is to be weak," the thunder God said. His voice was low, almost angry, and outside it had suddenly begun to rain. "To allow another man to dominate you as he would a woman is to be argr. Argr is lesser; the least of all in Asgard. To be kept hidden, as Loki was, tells others that you are ashamed of him, that he is to be secret; a consort, not a lover. If an argr was to talk of his, uh," Thor faltered for a word here, unsure what to call their relationship because argr didn't have relationships, they were had sex with and then ignored until their services were needed again. Eventually, Thor continued, voice quieter now than before, but less angry, "encounters publically, he may be challenged to Hólmgang and killed by his, uh, by the one who dominates him. The dominator does not have his honour tainted by such encounters, but it is the lack of secrecy that offends."

Tony blinked again. He had been doing that a lot lately, he thought, feeling sort of foggy.

"You didn't ask for more, even though we both want that, because you thought I'd challenge you to a fight to the death? Because having people know about you and me would offend my honour? Even though everyone whose opinion I give a shit about already knows?" Tony cleared his throat (he had been doing that a lot too actually; maybe he was coming down with something?) "Am I getting that right?"

Loki shrugged, still looking a little resigned, like a kicked puppy that expected to be kicked again out of spite. Thor was frowning, no longer angry, but unable to fight the last millennium of culture and belief enough to not be ashamed by Loki's choices. Tony probably could have said something about the gay pride movement, and how there was nothing to be ashamed of, but he really didn't want to touch Asgard's issues with a ten foot lance, so instead he reached forward to drag Loki into his arms for another kiss.

When they pulled away, Tony said, "You guys are so fucked up." He felt Loki relax against him, body almost limp in his arms and Tony's pressed chest to chest with him. The God smiled widely, eyes bright as Tony kissed him again.

"Takes one to know one," Loki replied, with a wink, as they pulled apart.

**The End**

Thanks for reading :) I have one more to write and then I can move on to the Frostiron Bang and then back to my other, semi abandoned, stories :P


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